Do we have to lower our standards?

Happy Easter!! This trying Lent is over, and the joy of the Easter season is upon us! Thanks be to God!

How comforting it is to know that even after all of our “Lents” there will always be an Easter! In these days, there is so much hope and joy to be had, and it’s so great to be able to truly revel in it.

Today, I wanted to talk about throwaway culture in light of this joyous season. Throwaway culture is something Pope Francis talks about frequently in regards to the environment and human life. Basically, a throwaway culture does not value anything that is less than perfect. Throwaway culture damages the natural environment as well as the social and spiritual environments around us.

Now, I know this may start to sound like a classic “there are people starving in Africa” sort of post, but bear with me, people! Throwaway culture evades every little part of our lives. The milk carton says the milk expired yesterday, but it’s halfway full? Throw it away. That hairclip is missing a prong, but otherwise works fine? Throw it away. That other leg of chicken that isn’t to my taste? Throw it away. That toy we only used once? Throw it away. That baby who is predicted to have health problems? Throw them away. That baby who won’t be born into a perfect life? Throw him or her away. That child with special needs? Throw him or her away. That daughter who is not happy all the time? Throw her away.

So you see, throwaway culture is very much present in our lives, or mine at least. As it is Easter, I want to send a message of joy, so here we go. A way to prevent throwaway culture is to reject perfectionism. Perfectionism, at least in my view, is the very root of throwaway culture. That is to say, that so many people have an unrealistic standard for what their lives and everything in it should be (eg. my parents should act this way; my hair-tie should be this stretchy; my food should always be enjoyable; prayer should always  be a certain way; I don’t like this priest, so I’m going to cross my arms and pout the whole Mass; that person doesn’t go to Church, so I’m going to sit here and judge her etc.) that they throwaway whatever doesn’t match that standard, ie. everything.

In the same way, many people throw away the message of Easter when they have no need for it. The message of joy is always present in the Gospels, even in Ordinary Time. Every time we go to Mass, it is to celebrate and worship. There is definitely a reason why we say that priests celebrate Mass! (This is a little off topic, but I remember seeing something from Pope Benedict XVI that said: “The Mass isn’t boring; your soul is boring.” I just love that, and it was a point of growth for me in my faith.)

Specifically this year, 2020, among the coronavirus pandemic, I have seen a throwaway of Mass itself. (And listen, I will be the first to admit that my prayer life lately has been a mess during this time of isolation, so I’m not saying I don’t do this too.) I see people’s attitudes towards Mass with my own eyes: If I can’t go to Mass in person, then I won’t go to Mass at all. And if I do watch the Mass, I’m just going to sit there idly and watch it like I would a television show.

What? No! This is the Mass. The Mass is a prayer. As with all prayers, it is not something where we can sit back and make God to all the work. I wish we could be in the Church too, but the fact is that we are the Church itself. Did we not learn this lesson with the burning of the spire at Notre Dame last year? (Read my musing about this.) However, I know I’m not the first Catholic to be saying things like this during the suspension of public Masses, but the Mass is still being celebrated everyday by our wonderful priests, and our presence is not necessary for the graces to be won; that doesn’t mean that God wants you to stop praying.

Therefore, my friends, take JOY in knowing that in the same way God wants us to reject throwaway culture, He wants you to reject the lie that you are disposable. God loves us so much, and He mourns knowing that some people in your life might “throw you away” because you’re not perfect (eg. you “pray too much”; you sing too much… and badly; you don’t get good grades; you’re an introvert; you don’t smile enough; you suffer from mental illness; etc).

You’re not perfect, and honestly, you never will be. But that’s okay because God loves the imperfect you. We need to know that other people are imperfect too and to trust the Perfect One. He rejects perfectionism and doesn’t participate in throwaway culture. He simply loves. And I think that’s what He wants us to do too! We have to try our best (and trust me, I know that it is a struggle) to love the imperfect the way the Perfect One does.

(Side note: I don’t mean this whole musing to say that you shouldn’t have standards at all for people. What I have in mind here is if you were to date, you should have high standards. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. I’m just saying that no man or woman is wholly perfect and that they will fail at one point or another. But we still need to have a standard. Also, I just want to clarify that it’s okay to have standards about food and things we enjoy that I mentioned in the beginning, but we just have to be willing to accept that the standards aren’t going to be met all the time. So, we need to learn to enjoy things as they come, even if they fall below our standards. Ok, mini-rant over!)

And so, let us cherish this joy of the Easter season, and not throw it away when it feels imperfect. Hallelujah!

Joyfully,